Define: "Automagic" in Business
Fiscal Threat Level
Multi-headcount capital waste
CWO Pro-Tip
"Magic isn't real, and neither is automated BGP failover without strict configuration. Ask to see the raw logs."
What HR thinks it means:
A process or technology that functions so seamlessly and intuitively it appears to work by magic.
What does "Automagic" actually mean?
"A sales buzzword used to hide the fact that their 'turnkeyTurnkeyA system that will require 6 months of custom integration by the engineering team to function at all.' software requires 400 lines of custom scripting just to connect to the database."
How HR uses it:
"Our new orchestration tool handles server provisioning completely automagically."
How you actually use it:
"The vendor promised the failover to the secondary site would be automagic, which naturally resulted in a total network partition."
Related Terminology
Tired of hearing this?
Next time someone says "Automagic" in a meeting, track exactly how much company money they just wasted. Play Buzzword Bingo, generate a waste invoice, and stop the bleeding.
